Children of Father Frost
or An Icy Melting Pot

On the New Year Eve children in Russia, just like other children in the world, are waiting for the presents. Before the XX Century it was an Eve of Christmas just like everywhere else in Christian countries, but with the Christmas prohibited in the Soviet Union for the most part of the XX Century, the occasion moved to the New Year. Well, now Christmas returned wit vengeance – now Russians celebrate both Catholic Christmas on December 25th, and their own Orthodox Christmas on January 7th. For reference, January 7th is December 25th by Julian calendar which was in place at the time when Jesus Christ was born. But even with two Christmas around, New Year is still the main event of the year in Russia and also the time when everybody gets presents.

Only, it’s not St.Nick who brings the presents, it’s Father Frost or, more precisely, Granddaddy Frost. They may be more correct in calling the frost “granddaddy” than they or anybody else thinks…

While Russians look like a genetic nationality, they are not. To understand that, let’s first consider what nationality is. For most of the human history, nationality was a large group of people living compactly on some territory, sharing common genetic and historical origin, common culture and language, common government, common economic system, and common defense of their territory against external forces, usually with the help of some natural barriers to entry like Alps for Italy or English channel for Britain. With a luck of natural barriers, nationality rarely could hold on their sovereign rights, and then they becomes conquered. Such nationalities were keeping a common culture and language for some time until they were destroyed by newcomers like Celtic culture in Great Britain or Native Americans in the United States. Gene pool of a conquered nationality is usually mostly eliminated with a few assimilated exceptions.

The general idea of nationality, country and sovereignty is that you have a place where you procreate your genes and culture. Once people of your nationality conquer a country of people with other nationality and establish your sovereignty over them, you get more place to procreate your genes and your culture. The very word “sovereign” comes from “suzerain” – that’s the guy who has the right to have sex with your bride on the wedding night before you.

It does not work with Russia and Russians. In fact, it does not work both ways. First, it does not work as a protection for your genes and culture, see the chapter “Diverse by God Grace” for details. And it does not work for would-be-conquerors either. It does not work for them, because Father Frost claimed sovereignty over this land. Because he forces people here to procreate the genes and culture that can survive his presence.

United States were once announced to be a melting pot of nationalities and cultures. Russia is an icy cold melting pot. You come here with whatever genes and culture you have. You may be Greek, Jew, Norman, Mongol, German, French, even African… it does not matter. Because when you get out, you are Russian. Whatever genes and elements of your culture helped to survive in Russia, got spread around, enthusiastically adopted, and became part of Russian genes and Russian culture. Whatever of your genes and culture could not survive in Russia, did not. You come to Russia, you have to evolve to survive… into a Russian.

Speaking of Africans, grand grandfather of the greatest Russian poet Alexander Pushkin was an Ethiopian prince who was send to the court of Peter the Great. He married a Russian woman and eventually become an admiral of Russian Navy. That’s just one example of what I am talking about.

It’s that simple. Russians is not a genetic nationality. Russians are those who live and survive in Russia. If you imagine that the whole population of Russia somehow disappeared, say, moved to some other place, and the land was populated by completely different people, then wait for a few generations, and you will see the same habits, the same customs, the same physical type. Do you know that northern Chinese has almost the same body type as Russians? That’s because in Asia the magic isotherm catches Mongolia and part of the northern China. Considering such virtual experiment of swapping the whole population of Russia with somebody else, the language may be not the same, but with the speed Russian language assimilates elements of other languages, it anyway changes every couple of centuries or so as much as Shakespearian language differs from the modern English, not to mention American.

You may think, that’s all fine, but a little abstract. Is it? Ok, let’s look at a couple of concrete examples:

• Vodka
• Tea
• Pork and lard
• “Those lazy Russians…”